funny christian quotes

Never worry about the size of your Christmas tree. In the eyes of children, they are all 30 feet tall. ~Larry Wilde, The Merry Book of Christmas



To me, the greatest pleasure of writing is not what it's about, but the inner music the words make. ~Truman Capote, McCall's, November 1967



Any man may be in good spirits and good temper when he's well dressed. There ain't much credit in that. ~Charles Dickens



When you gamble with safety, you bet your life. ~Author Unknown



Women, don't get a tattoo. That butterfly looks great on your breast when you're twenty or thirty, but when you get to seventy, it stretches into a condor. ~Billy Elmer



Here is the test to find whether your mission on earth is finished. If you're alive, it isn't. ~Richard Bach



"This fall I think you're riding for - it's a special kind of fall, a horrible kind. The man falling isn't permitted to feel or hear himself hit bottom. He just keeps falling and falling. The whole arrangement's designed for men who, at some time or other in their lives, were looking for something their own environment couldn't supply them with. Or they thought their own environment couldn't supply them with. So they gave up looking. They gave it up before they ever really even got started." ~J.D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye, Chapter 24, spoken by the character Mr. Antolini



Blessed is the season which engages the whole world in a conspiracy of love! ~Hamilton Wright Mabie



Love, and a cough, cannot be hid. ~George Herbert, Jacula Prudentum, 1651



Dogs laugh, but they laugh with their tails. What puts man in a higher state of evolution is that he has got his laugh on the right end. ~Max Eastman



Our siblings. They resemble us just enough to make all their differences confusing, and no matter what we choose to make of this, we are cast in relation to them our whole lives long. ~Susan Scarf Merrell



A fine is a tax for doing something wrong. A tax is a fine for doing something right. Author Unknown



Luck is when opportunity knocks and you answer. ~Author Unknown



Religion seems to have a way of making people abandon logic. ~Amanda Baxter



Programming is similar to a game of golf. The point is not getting the ball in the hole but how many strokes it takes. ~Harlan Mills



Wanting to change, to improve, a person's situation means offering him, for difficulties in which he is practiced and experienced, other difficulties that will find him perhaps even more bewildered. ~Rainer Maria Rilke



We always keep God waiting while we admit more importunate suitors. ~Malcolm de Chazal



Barbarism is needed every four or five hundred years to bring the world back to life. Otherwise it would die of civilization. ~Edmond and Jules de Goncourt, Journal, 3 September 1855



Perhaps history is a thing that would stop happening if God held His breath, or could be imagined as turning away to think of something else. ~Herbert Butterfield, Christianity and History



A friend accepts us as we are yet helps us to be what we should. ~Author Unknown